You have weird kids. I have weird pets. Let’s begin.

My life is quite plain to be honest. I have a wonderful husband, a lovely home, a great job and two pets. Two weird pets with wild and crazy personalities that drive me wild and crazy – pretty much every day. Tonight is a fine example. I unloaded the dishwasher and went back to the living room to fetch a straggler glass from the end table to run another load and notice that the dog is meditating towards our couch.

What is this lump?

Upon closer inspection I realize that she is fixated on a lump in the center of the couch, underneath the couch cover to be specific. (Plaid couch, don’t ask, it’s a work-in-progress.) So I naturally grab my new fancy phone and decide to investigate said situation more closely.

After peeking under the cover I realize that our cat has moved in. She stares at me inquisitively and sends a warning hiss out at the dog. Ok, now we are beginning to understand why in the past few weeks have I been notice our couch cover being pushed up. I thought it was the dog hunting for toys under our fabulous piece of furniture, but nay, it’s Stella’s new haven.

Yes? May I help you?

The cat shaped mass remained put for the last 30 minutes with intermediate paw swipes and hisses at the dog. Now let’s back up this story by a couple of months. This hateful cat/dog relationship has taken some odd turns. For example, our dog violently grooms Stella’s head leaving the poor, pointy-eared creature with additional furry points. Our cat has taken to rubbing up against the dog when she saunters into a room. I think she is trying to trip up the dog and kill her. This process is slow going as it hasn’t worked yet. So even though I am currently hearing some angry gurgling coming from Stella, I know it’s all for show.

So to recap, your kids may do some funny stuff and things you feel are worth posting to the world. But let’s face it my pets can give your snotty-nosed children a run for their money any day.